I had one of those weeks.
Where everything went south, where work was like a Sisyphus-esque boulder on my back as I headed uphill (and my balance was as sturdy as melted butter), where a few tears were shed, where, yes, I wanted to open my lips and release the kind of primal scream that would end up on a CNN News running headline.
*”Girl releases primal scream. Causes near deafness in anyone with ears. More info at 11.”
*Hopefully, Anderson Cooper will report the story and ask to interview me (and yes, I will so grant that interview), during which the subject of the primal scream will be replaced with a long conversation on pop culture, his dreamy blue eyes, and the mutual agreement that, minutes after the interview, he and I must become best friends.
I had one of those weeks.
Rather than attempting to figure it out, I will focus on what I learned. Here comes an 8th-grade style heading (for nostalgia purposes) and a few bullets:
What I Learned
English – 7th Period
- I do not and cannot handle stress well. No amount of relaxation breathing or visualizing or trying to remove myself from the situation helps me. I make mistakes on the task at hand, I cry, I sigh, I get angry, I want to release said primal scream. But because I’m currently not independently wealthy or cushioned by a second income, I have to work. And at work, stress has made itself quite comfortable. So I have to figure out how to make things work. Implosion is likely, but it’s not an option. I need to research, read articles, force myself to do some of that breathing.
- Work stinks. Unless you’re Anderson Cooper’s personal assistant (which means you have the best job ever) or a person does what they truly love, work stinks. Yes, there is a paycheck for your trouble, but again, unless that check is coming from Anderson Cooper, or from yourself, or from an employer that pays you incredible amounts of money, that paycheck only emphasizes the stinkiness of it all. All that said, I need to keep “work stinks” in mind. Makes it easier to be less surprised when the stinkiness floats to the surface.
- Other people really don’t get it. They’re sad because you’ve opened your mouth and released a silent primal scream and they want to comfort you, but the specific situation you’re going through is only kind of relevant to you. Nevertheless, relying on others important. Soothing and comfort is very important. Talk it out, Girley.
- This is what being an adult is all about, really. Dealing. Freaking out. Handling it.
This ends the weekly bullets and this little missive.
Now. On to somehow becoming BFFs with Anderson Cooper…