So, I have this tendency to focus squarely on my flaws. I don’t know. As a reminder that I’m utterly human? To make sure that conceit/ego/arrogance are kept at bay? I don’t know. Throughout the day, as I participate in my usual internal dialogue, we (as in me, myself, and I; I’m not crazy, I swear; I believe most of us engage in an internal dialogue with ourselves; right, right? Oh, God, I said ourselves…) discuss things about the self that need changing. It’s important to be self-aware, isn’t it?
However, there’s self-awareness, then there’s recognizing that I rarely take on the role of being my own personal cheerleader. I spend more time telling myself that I’m playing the game wrong than cheering myself on. Therefore, with being in my 30s now and having a fuller understanding of myself and the many facets of my nature (thank you, 30s, because that kind of continuous clarity did not come in the 20s), it’s time to 1) acknowledge that there’s way too much mental naysaying going on, and 2) make some major changes.
What kind of changes?
Affirmations. Reminders. Cheerleading. (If I go into TOO much detail about the changes to come, nothing will be sacred. I’ll have to live my entire life online. No plans on doing that. The above two paragraphs and this current sentence are about as personal as I’ll get).
Hopefully, I won’t turn into a Stuart Smalley nightmare or something.