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20/20

22 Aug

Inspired by my gal and fellow blogger Toia, here are 20 random facts about me, myself, and yes, I.

1. My disdain for Anne Hathaway knows no bounds. Don’t ask me why. But it’s the first thing I thought of.
2. My love for music much older than me is intense and everlasting.
3. I intentionally misspelled a word during my 8th grade spelling bee so I could get back to class and watch “The Diary of Anne Frank.”
4. I know every tv theme song. Seriously.
5. I have a debilitating fear of water. And heights. And mold. And critters. And heights.
6. I don’t know how to ride a bike. There. I said it.
7. The Three Stooges. Enough said.
8. I could write a dissertation on unrequited love.
9. I’m a carnivore. For real.
10. Love, love, LOVE traveling!
11. I want to move to San Diego. Like yesterday.
12. I met Michael Bublé and he saved me from falling to my death in his tour bus. True story.
13. Clowns.terrify.me.
14. I’m secretly a major optimist, but pessimism is far more compelling, right? Right?
15. My joints pop. Loudly.
16. I take my role as an older sister kind of seriously. I worry about those nuts like I’m their mom or something.
17. The arts. Are my life. Film, music, theater, art, writing–all of it.
18. Sometimes I take naps in the bathroom at work. What? I’m tired.
19. I’d pretty much do anything to avoid dealing with Math.
20. The scent of cake baking in the oven? Heaven. Pure heaven.

That’s all, folks!

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I went to the woods.

6 Aug

thoreau

Thank You Notes.

14 May

Sharing a few thank you notes of my own. Shall we?

Thank you, Baz Luhrmann, for attacking my medulla with the craziest visuals this side of Moulin Rouge in your interpretation of The Great Gatsby. It was enjoyable, for the most part, and sealed my conviction that the Academy Award presented to this one earlier this year should be taken away immediately and given to DiCaprio. Enough already. The man is supremely talented and we live in a world where Marisa Tomei has one. Come on.

Thank you, bestie, for being the bestie. She really is the very best. Never have I enjoyed a friendship where I’m thrilled, fascinated, incensed, and very much loved all at the same time, most of these emotions happening minutes after the other. I can only hope I provide the same sweet madness for her.

Thank you, darling schizophrenic weather, for justifying the fact that I never put away my winter clothes. It’s almost the middle of May, you guys. And it is currently 54 degrees. My sweaters continue to laugh with abandon.

Thank you, firm and good decisions. Of late, I’ve had to make some interesting decisions in my life. Being someone who wants most of the people in my life to be happy, I was forgetting that ultimately, my happiness is important, as well. Taking the time to really deliberate this, along with lots of prayer, truly helped in finally making my choices. And I’m happy.

Onwards? Yes?

Day Sixteen.

16 Apr

Learning, Gratitude
(Hindsight)

To you.
The heart should never be
so revealed, so unaware of where
the results will land.
No more waiting when the answers
are usually quite clearly there.
No matter if you were moved.
Time to move on.
Thank you.

 

To you.
Too open, too fast, too trusting.
Too bad, too bad, too bad.
In the end, you actually missed me.
In the end, I walked away with no regrets,
warmly blanketed by the comfort
of full circle.
Thank you.

 

To you.
Ah, you.
There are no words–
well, there are words–
but which ones?
(Blissfully) blinded, (glaringly) sighted, (then) goodbye.
I carved you out of the clay of perfection
and quietly watched the hand of truth smash you to pieces…

 

Still you.
Still thinking about it.
Still sighted, yes, but no longer
looking back in youthful anger.
Now, a sad, adult understanding of what came to be,
what became of you.
Nevertheless–regardless–in spite of–
thank you, thank you, thank you.

seriously, what in the world does Kitten Heel Marvel mean?

3 Aug

Marvel at the kitten heels, why don’t you?

We’ve talked before about the genesis of Kitten Heel Marvel. In short, this blog was formerly titled “So I Don’t Forget,” in reference to reminding myself not to forget my love of writing. After experiencing a really weird and long strain of writer’s block, a former co-worker suggested that I blog in an attempt to keep my creative brain stimulated. I took her advice, and “So I Don’t Forget” was born. However, I wanted something more eye-catching, more interesting to call my little JournaBlog. Enter kitten heels. Literally, inspiration came by way of shoe.I bought a pair of kitten heels at the store one day and marveled at the combination of comfort and dressiness they provided me. (Late bloomer, ok? Just…late bloomer.) Yes, I really did marvel at a pair of shoes. But I started reflecting that life itself is a marvel. To be human is a marvel. Writing, thoughts, family, work…all part of the marvelous human experience, my human experience. Enter Kitten Heel Marvel.Well, this morning, I read “Ten Steps to Better Blogging” from WordPress. The “Get Focused” feature caught my eye, and it was an interesting read. Essentially, a particular thought stood out to me from the article:

Even if you’ve been blogging regularly for years, this is a good opportunity to revisit and refine your site’s focus. 

I went all existential on Kitten Heel Marvel. What is the true focus of this site? What does it all mean? Can my life, writing, and experiences fit into a neat one or two-word format, like Travel or Pop Culture? After all, when I started my other blog baby, The Lonely Passport, it was done with a specific goal in mind: discuss my adventures, love, and plans for all-things travel and only travel. And you know what? Early on, I enjoyed posting on The Lonely Passport more than I did for Kitten Heel Marvel. (If these two things were children, I would so be on the Maury Show for the “Giiiirrrl, you Playin’ Favorites!” episode.) The Passport felt more streamlined, neater, interesting. Perhaps it was because I could take a less personal (read: less revealing about yours truly) approach to the Passport, whereas Kitten Heel Marvel is purely about me, even if I do tend to hold back for reasons I’ve mentioned before. (Still working on that.) Or, perhaps I considered the Passport as having more of a structure, and sometimes I looked at the Marvel as more of a free-for-all. In a battle of specificity and generality, I would almost always choose the former, and I think, in the beginning, the Passport represented that to me. These days, though, I love all my children equally, which is largely evidenced by my equally irregular posting for both blogs. All about equality, I am.

But remember: I went all existential on the Marvel. And I had to ask the following big question: is it the name of this blog that has me thinking about its true focus? Do name, content, and focus go hand in hand? There are countless of blogs that I enjoy visiting.  And you know what? Most of them have blog names that uniquely express the content you’re about to find. Even The Lonely Passport gives you a huge clue that it’s travel-related. So what is Kitten Heel Marvel saying? Fashion blog? Shoe blog? Marvel comics? Or does it all even matter?

I call this forum my little JournaBlog because it is precisely that to me: a journal. I journal about my life, my thoughts, my writing, all things uniquely related to me that I would like to share. But if we want to categorize Kitten Heel Marvel, I would call it a lifestyle blog, for sure. All aspects of my life, posted for your reading pleasure, if you so choose to read. And perhaps that is the focus: all things uniquely related to me. It may not be a one or two-word description about the format, but there it is…

However, and to be super honest, I’m wondering about this name. Because in all written work, there’s nothing like a good title…

Tell me: what kind of thought did you put into the name of your blogs, if you blog? Do you think a good name inherently goes with the interest readers will have in your blog? Did the name inspire the focus/content, or was it the other way around? Does it even matter? And lastly, because I’m all about questions, obviously, should I think about retiring Kitten Heel Marvel as a name?

meet me at the crossroads of ordinary and extraordinary.

2 Aug

What do you write about?

It’s the standard question I get when people find out I’m a writer. I typically respond that I write about “relationships,” which is largely true. My fascination with how people truly relate to one another–mothers and fathers, husbands and wives, siblings, friends–and the psychology of it all has only grown with time and understanding. So, yeah, that’s me in the corner, watching, listening, analyzing. (Am I a voyeur? Absolutely. People, strangers, are infinitely inspiring and intriguing. And really, once we step outside our homes, everything you and I do is subject to observation. Sorry if you wanted that loud argument with your wife in the middle of a public aisle in the grocery store to be private.) In fact, before I went with the Plan A of majoring in English in college, I actually wanted to be a Psychology major, with the hope of someday becoming a therapist. Yes. It’s true. I even wanted to start my own practice, the ultimate chance to fulfill my people fascination with the belief that I could also help people sort out their lives. Anyway, when I told my beloved Dad heard that, he nearly fell out of his chair and forbade it immediately. Perhaps he had visions of me psychoanalyzing he and my mother’s disciplining methods? (“How do you really feel about grounding me?”)

I digress. But you’re used to that, aren’t you? Re-reading some of my older work this past week, I realized that the same theme revealed itself over and over again: ordinary people meeting with extraordinary events. It’s a bit cliched, but I was writing stories about run-of-the-mill people reacting to hardly run-of-the-mill situations. Even a few doses of whimsy here and there. Back then, I prided myself on coming up with ideas and plots that I knew were solely from the trenches of my imagination. And they were always stories that I, from the vantagepoint of just a reader, enjoyed reading.

What’s changed with my newer work, you ask, because you know that’s where I’m going? Several years ago, I felt that my writing needed to become “real”. Relatable. I wanted my readers to think while reading, “I get this. I’ve experienced this.” However, in comparing the old with the new, I noticed a few things. I’ve stripped the extraordinary. The new ones are…they just are. But I write fiction, folks! Yes, I write about relationships. Yes, I include psychobabble here and there. But I also write fiction. And fiction may be based in reality, experiences, relationships, and psychology, but at its core, it’s “something invented by the imagination or feigned.”   I want to go back to that! So it’s time to stop sacrificing the shiniest, giddiest parts of my imagination for relatibility. Instead, I’m going to experiment with blending the two. Truthfully, I’ve already started. I’ve restarted some of my older, unfinished works, which number in the hundreds, and we’re in the process of serious blending. So…

What do you write about?

The ordinary and the extraordinary.

And in the end:

the past is prologue?

21 Jan

Four years ago, on January 21, 2008, this was what I posted. Apparently, I was concerned with horrors unleashed on my DMV photo, and sibling-related vengeance. So…not much has changed, huh?

Reflections of the Way I…Used to Be?

So I recently renewed my driver’s license online. It was painless, quick and easy (unlike the last time, when I was inexplicably forced to take a faulty test and almost manifested my rage at the guy taking my picture. One should never desire to kick someone in the knee, not ever), and I was slated to receive the new license about five days later.

I received the license this past Friday. A few things:

  1. I looked like a pig. An actual pig. AN ACTUAL PIG.
  2. Oddly enough, it wasn’t the photo from the license I had just renewed, which I assumed it would be. It was some other weird looking photo, where my posture was terrible and I had this strange, almost smug smirk on my face. Smug? I never look smug! (Well, I don’t try to).
  3. It appeared as if my picture had been age-progressed. Seriously. Rather than feature what I currently look like, the picture seemed to guess what I’ll look like 5 years from now, when the license expires.

My younger brother seemed to get a kick out of #3. “You’ve been age-progressed! Ha ha!” That particular revenge will be sweet. Anyway…

I placed the license in my wallet with a resolute sigh, pleased that, at least, a trip to the horrid DMV had been avoided. These days, even thinking about kicking someone may land me in some jail somewhere. Times have changed.

The weekend was interesting. Packed with activity and pretty fast. Wasn’t it just last Friday?

BJ & FE SCOTT

...LIVING THE BEST LIFE EVER!

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